That is a word in the English language, right? i am pretty sure i have heard of it before, though its meaning certainly eludes me right now. I tell you what folks, i think i am trying to wear a few too many hats. I am in need of some serious balance, and i am not sure when/ if / where i am going to find it.
As you may or may not know, i am in the midst of opening a tea house here in Atlanta. We closed on the property where it is located on New Year's Eve and have been working on getting the doors open since then. I will not bore you by carrying on and on about what that entails or HOW MUCH THAT COSTS... suffice it to say- a LOT--- on both counts. I don't mean to sound like i am surprised by this information- i knew it would be a hard row to how and that it would cost us a lot of money.... but as time goes on, and things keep getting checked off the list.... new, expensive, complicated items continue to be added. Everyone asks us, "When is the big day?".... "When are you opening?" and i am so tired of having to say things like, "as soon as possible"... "as soon as we can get and pass our health inspection".... I don't mean to sound like a martyr here- or like i am in the midst of something that has been forced upon me-- and honestly, it is my amazing business partner who is doing the lion's share of the work- the organizing and ordering, the meeting with the $&%*# county, writing up the menues etc etc etc (hundreds of thousands of things). But i have been pretty obsessed and busy with the whole project too (as have our husbands- who have been amazing and who i could write a whole other post about) and have been so caught up doing this and that for the shop for the last few months that the other parts of my life have totally fallen by the wayside.
I do laundrey at least once a week - and by that i mean that i wash a number of loads of clothing- most of the dirty laundrey being made by the children and my DH. fine. normal. but the the clean clothes get piled and piled higher on the couch and on the childrens' dressers and left in laundrey baskets, and noone can find anything to wear, and when it is time for soccer, we can't locate shin guards and there are dirty dishes in the sink, and the dishwasher needs to be unloaded and there are ants on the kitchen counter and so much dust and dirt and pet hair on the floors that the dust bunnies can't even be called dust "bunnies" anymore and really resemble something more like "dust buffalo". ( I almost got trampled by one this morning)... The puppy is chewing on and ruining the childrens shoes that are left here and there, they eat too much maccaroni and cheese lately, I can't seem to return phonecalls for the life of me, the family room looks like it was the setting of a small tropical storm.... and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. I miss my kids and have not spent nearly enough time with them lately-- i can see it especially in the little one and it is breaking my heart. and finally, (well, not finally- the list is so long- but this is where i will end this rant) i have not been in the studio making or glazing anything for almost two months- with the exception of stamps and a few pendants and buttons. If you know me at all or have seen one of my overflowing sketchbooks, or had the "priviledge" to hear me carry on about any of the 207 ideas that come into my head all day- you would understand that this is just not ACCEPTABLE. i NEED to make things. When i don't make this, i am a crazy, grumpy person. I have not even been able to take and edit the photographs of all of the pieces that i had made up to two months ago and that is making me crazy too.... finished work, just sitting, not selling-- getting dusty for crying out loud!
so, i am really carrying on here... and i don't think anyone will want to read this... and i am not looking for sympathy .... i just need to put some of this out there so that maybe i will stop feeling so nudgy. I know that it will not always be like this and i know there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and that one day- hopefully in the very near future- our doors will be open for business and there will be people serving tea to lots of customers and i can be back in my studio making mugs and bowls and buttons and paintings and mosaics and jewelry and magnets and clocks and garden markers.... that i will play with my kids again and have time to read them more stories and take them to the park and have picnics on the play structure out back....
alrighty then. that is all for now. i apologize for the rant. but i DO feel a little better. and now it is time to change out of my pajamas and get over the the aforementioned shop before my partner thinks that i have run away.
hmm.... where COULD i run away to?.................................
It is no secret that i am completely addicted to texture. I look at EVERYTHING around me and think about how i can capture its texture to incorporate into something pottery related. So, i collect antique (and other) buttons, funky cabochons, quirky miniatures and toys, sea shells and fruit pits.... I make silicone molds of them-- as well as the bottoms of shoes, wood-carvings, cookies,fruits and vegetables, baskets, clothing, thrift store finds... I carve stamps and texture sheets out of linoleum and soft cut, from clay and plaster, i make stamps from bubble wrap, perforated steel, hardware cloth, nuts and bolts and screws.... So, i hoard all of these things and then i use them to make ceramic pieces which i hoard as well. All fine and good. i use many of these things to make earrings and pendants, rings, magnets, embellishments for my own art and pieces for mosaic. The thing is, i make way more than i can ever really use. They pile up and take up space in the studio. You would think i would stop making them- stop collecting them.... but i really can't! So, once again i will be listing more of these items in my etsy shop-- so that others who love and appreciate them can use them in their creations too! When i first opened my shop, i had more pendants and tile type things for sale, and for some reason i stopped making them available... i guess it seemed like too much of a bother to list such small items.... But now, spring is here, and i am eager to get the studio in working order again- eager to clean and organize and systematize-- and also excited to share some of my finds with you!! So, please check in soon and often as i will be creating a flurry of listings comprised of materials for others to use.
